This moment probably sums up every boy’s nightmare of meaning the right thing but saying it completely wrong.
Me: Touch my hair. It’s so soft and shiny!
[B pats my head]
B: It feels like cotton.
Me: Cotton!? You mean SILK?
B: ….Yeah, nice…silky cotton. I like cotton.
Me: No, you don’t.
[silence as I mentally file this away in the “mean things my husband accidentally says to me like that one time he said I wasn’t a horrible bitch which somehow implied that I am a horrible bitch because you never use those two words towards your significant other” file.]