iphone

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Wisdom Teeth Out!

May 27, 2010 in Thoughts by Moye | 2 comments

Today marks the first time I’ve seen B all drugged up and it’s all sorts of awesome. He had his wisdom teeth removed this morning, and I was the designated “person to hang out with until the anesthesia wears off so you can take him home.” I was tempted to bring a video camera in the off chance I could create the next viral “David Goes to the Dentist” hit but I totally forgot when we left the house.

Instead, I watched B try to sign language his thoughts to me, which made absolutely no sense. What does pointing at the door, then your wrist and then holding up your hand mean? I need to go outside to check the time and hello?

I gave him my iPhone instead, so he could type out what the heck he was trying to say, and the above is what I got. Right. I get the last part. I like turtles, too.

Now, he’s recuperating at work while I bring home the bacon. Since his mouth is stuffed with gauze (meaning no phone calls) and he’s not on his computer (meaning no emails), the only way I can communicate him is through Xbox Live (thanks to Red Dead Redemption). *sigh* Life is so hard.

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Words with People Who Are No Longer My Friends

February 12, 2010 in Thoughts by Moye | 3 comments

Okay, I’m kidding about that last part. You guys are all my friends. I just totally suck at Scrabble-esque games like Words with Friends and I have never, ever, ever won a single game. I currently have 8 games going on, and I’m losing all of them by at least 100 points. It’s ridiculous. How is this possible?

I read a lot, I know lots of words and I think I did pretty well on the verbal portion of my SATs. I wrote over 15 pages of crap for my senior thesis. I GRADUATED FROM A UNIVERSITY.  So how come I totally blow at this game? ARGGGGH.

The only thing that’s keeping me from throwing my phone across the room during the game is knowing that I still totally rule with the quick math tests on Brain Age. Take that, nerds! You may consider “QI” a word, but at least I can add, subtract and multiply better!

So there. Is English not your first language? Are you under the age of 10? Are you mildly retarded yet you somehow have an iPhone? Are you missing fingers? LET’S PLAY. My self-esteem needs it. Badly. Otherwise, I might eat a tub of ice cream alone on Valentine’s Day.

Speaking of Valentine’s Day, I worked really hard on this post. And by “post,” I really mean all those blinged out gifs.

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BLAHSDAY

January 27, 2010 in Thoughts by Moye | No comments

Um, yeah. It’s Apple Wednesday which means I kind of want to throw my iPhone out the window but I decided that if I still hear maxi-pad jokes about the iPad by Sunday, January 31st, THEN I’M GOING TO….buy one. Seriously. You thought I was going to say “knock a bitch up”, right? Ha ha, got you!

Wait, crap. I don’t have $500 to spend.

Anyway, this gif makes me happy.

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Texts From My Mom

July 31, 2009 in Asians, Thoughts by Moye | 4 comments

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I don’t know who taught my mom to text on her cell phone but somehow she figured it out and has managed to send me the occasional message. This usually happens if I don’t pick up the phone when she calls because I’m at work or driving or just plain don’t want to deal with her.

Here are the most recent three, which I saved because I just love how it goes  from her proclaiming that she has berries for me, to demanding to take an entire pie that I had just baked, to a huge cry for help.

And no, I just didn’t ignore these messages. I dutifully called her back after I got each one.

Oh, Mommy. Now if only she could figure out how to G-chat.

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My Name Is Porsche

July 23, 2009 in Asians, Thoughts by Moye | 2 comments

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Today, in the midst of Comic-Con stuff, we took a moment to see how well the Google voice search worked. And it was pretty accurate! Unless you have my name, which Google thinks is “Porsche AC Motor.”

*sigh*

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Wanted: Everything Because I Deserve It

June 23, 2009 in Thoughts, nerdalert by Moye | 3 comments

As cool as Freecycle is, it’s gotten to the point where I just automatically delete the daily emails, because I don’t really need anything, I don’t have anything free to give away and reading them fills me with such rage over the entitlement of some of our fellow city dwellers.

Sometimes, though, I take a peek at them…and find myself filling with rage yet again. Here’s what came in today:

WANTED – iPod Touch (xxxx)
need this not for fun but for work – so, it’s URGENT..
if you have one you do not need/use – PLEASE let me know…
thanks in advance.

Someone please tell me what kind of job absolutely requires an iPod Touch. Either this employer is completely clueless on what the iPod Touch is, or there really is a job out there that requires you to download apps, play games, listen to music, check your email and surf the Internet (but only if you have access to a WiFi connection).

I think these iPods are stupid to begin with (I still don’t understand the purpose of having one, unless you like browsing the web on a tiny device only where you have Wi-Fi) but a job that requires one? PLEASE.

WANTED: Any Wii Accessories (xxxxx)
Looking for any unwanted wii accessories such as extra controllers, guitar hero guitars/mics/ drums, mario kart wheels, etc.

No. Sure, our Wii is gathering dust (but only because I need to replace the batteries on my Fit board and I’m too scared to see what happens when I finally step on it), but there is no way in hell you’re getting our remotes for free.

Wanted: iPhone or iPod Touch (xxxx)
I’m looking for a working used iPhone or iPod Touch. I’m in Downtown LA but can arrange to meet anywhere within reason in a public space like Starbucks.

I’m guessing some people will be tossing their old iPhone into the old junk drawer. Would much appreciate if you would consider giving me your hand-me-down.

Thanks!

Okay. I kind of understand the thought process behind this one. New, improved and cooler iPhone 3GS comes out, which means current iPhone owners will upgrade in a hurry, abandoning their old phones to rot in some dark, empty drawer.

Except that most iPhone users will have to fork over $4oo to $500 to get the 3GS, while their current phone works better than ever with the new 3.0 firmware and still sells for almost $100.  So why the hell would someone give away their iPhone for free? WHY?

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Awkward iPhone Time

March 11, 2009 in Thoughts by Moye | 2 comments

Hmm...

So I’ve been logging my diet/exercise process with this cool iPhone application called “Lose It!” though it should be renamed as “This Is How Much Weight You Keep Gaining Back!” because I don’t know how much it has helped. It logs way less calories burned than what the gym machines tell me, but I can’t tell which one is the liar. I like to think it’s my iPhone, based on the fact that the less weight you lose, the longer you’ll use the application…right?

Anyway, I was looking for the various exercise activities that I could log (like breathing, eating, sitting, napping–seriously, ANYTHING to keep that calorie number down) and came across this. And I blushed.

Sexual activity? Does that really burn enough calories to matter? Isn’t it different for girls and guys? Doesn’t it vary with positions? Only 10 calories for a half hour? That can’t be true! And the longest amount of time you can log is 55 minutes. What if you do the whole Tantric thing?

Read the rest of this entry »

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GIMME GIMME GIMME

April 2, 2008 in Thoughts by Moye | 2 comments

I wanted to post this yesterday, but real life got in the way. Plus, sometimes the Internet can be really boring or annoying or both, and there aren’t enough pictures of baby polar bears to make up for it.

But I found this awesome post on LA’s Freecycle community. If you don’t know what Freecycle is, then you’re not really missing out on anything. It’s a nationwide group that tries to lessen our impact on landfills by allowing people to “offer” their unwanted items to others instead of merely throwing them away. You can also post “wanted” items that you need that people may not use anymore, etc etc. Overall, it’s awesome. We all accumulate junk and it’s the perfect avenue to clean out your life, as well as provide for others. I hate hate hate hate throwing things away (don’t worry, I am NOT A HOARDER) and Freecycle gave me the opportunity to recycle old snowboarding gear, rugs, curtains, routers, etc.

The key is to NOT buy new things after you freecycle them, because that just defeats the purpose.

The other important note is that you’re not supposed to be all greedy, illogical and stupid. You’re not supposed to request free services, or solicit pity for your sorry life. For example, this guy Bill, who posted the below:

Wanted: iPhone 90046
Posted by: “Bill”
Mon Mar 31, 2008 8:32 am
I dropped my iPhone out of my jacket in a cab I was in Saturday nite
and it was ‘missing’ when I called the cab company 20 minutes later.

Your generosity would be GREATLY appreciated.

At first I thought this was a not-funny April Fool’s Joke. Then I saw that it was actually posted Monday morning.

WTF, Bill? Last time I checked, iPhones were still pretty popular and NOT taking up space in our landfills. People aren’t giving this shit away for free, and nor are they throwing them out. Our generosity would be greatly appreciated?? Really? Really. Well, guess what. Generosity isn’t reusable trash, so rethink your priorities and pony up the cash to buy yourself a new jacket with better pockets.

This beats the other post I found ages ago, where someone asked for a horse and a Segway. I wish I was kidding, but I’m not.

I hate humans. Baby polar bears all the way!

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